Where does Tess fit into all of this?
As can be seen from the photograph below, Tess is a cat. A cat with a propensity to go shed surfing.
As a cat, she is the sworn enemy of Tom, who spends most of his time trying to annoy her. What he forgets is that as a cat she is genetically programmed to get her own back, no matter how long it takes.
She states that one of her favourite pastimes is laying "chocolate" eggs in Tom's shoes while he sleeps. Of course, chocolate refers to the colour and texture of the gifts she leaves for him. The odour is something of a cross between lamb and rabbit in jelly (partly digested) or 4 week old blackbird (filleted and again partly digested).
She also states in a recent interview for Cat Monthly magazine that her best friend is Daniel and that she particularly likes the trick he does with marmite and ear wax...
Below is one of Tess's favourite training videos. Apparently all cats are required by law to undergo this training before being allowed to own humans...she asks that you watch to the end for her special treat for the unsuspecting sleeping human...
